Football: It’s not you, it’s me!
“We were on a break!”
Oh wait. I still am.
Sorry football. It’s not you, it’s me.
I know that sounds like a shit break up line, but it’s true. Football is still football. It still has its flaw, but the mass appeal is there. Nothing it does has changed. I have.
Probably since 2010, football was not just something I put on TV to simply watch. It became my life.
Through my original website — GibFootballShow — I blogged about every game of the 2010 World Cup. I gained some followers on Twitter, got passed the 100 mark and things snowballed from there.
https://twitter.com/Thefootyblognet/status/139489715165462528?s=20
A podcast appeared. Scott Johnson, Chris Mayer, Brent Atema, and loads of awesome guests who have gone on to great things.
(Pretty sure one of Ed Malyon’s first blog pieces was on GFS… What has he done since then?)
By the 2014 World Cup, I was writing about France for the Metro. I had gone from hobby writer, to paid writer, to freelance writer.
I had thrown myself into the world of French football with my studs up. Joey Barton would have been proud — he was, we interviewed him in 2013.
Football was my life. Writing allowed me to forge a career. I am not going to say I was a journalist. I wasn’t, but I got to write about a subject I loved.
Watching a new player breakthrough. Scouting him, writing profiles. Charting the progress. It was brilliant.
In 2017, Football Whispers offered me a FT role, which I snapped off them with both hands. I was able to get a mortgage and buy a house with my amazing wife.
Writing continued, social media work followed. I choose to move into that field to gain experience in a live environment in a industry which is only going to grow and grow. It was a career move.
However, during my two years at FW, working 9–6 five days a week, sometimes working weekend days to cover games, the love of the game died.
Something happens when you have to care, pay attention, think of angles, discuss, work on a subject every day. When you stop, you need space.
When the lid on my laptop shut just after 6pm, I didn’t want to watch a random Champions League game. I could catch up when I was on the clock.
I wanted to spend time with my wife, go to the movies, dive into my new found love of NFL, play PlayStation. Basically do anything which wasn’t watching football.
I keep up with Lille. They are my team, and let’s get one thing clear. They always will be. I will always care about their fate.
Yet, since joining FW, I had more interests outside of football. Delving into the world of British wrestling around Manchester and the North of England. Even if it was just one or two shows a month, it was something else to occupy my weekends.
If I was at home and Lille were on BT Sport, I’d watch, but no longer was my week scheduled around their fixtures.
Even while working at FW, because I was no longer freelancing in the world of French football, I had stopped watching 4/5 games a weekend. I watched my team. No longer was the 8pm KO on Sunday a must-watch. NFL RedZone had stolen my heart. It was social, it was fun, it wasn’t in any way work related.
https://twitter.com/nickcharles1010/status/1191054303026438146?s=20
When I was made redundant from FW, I knew I needed a break from the football world. I didn’t want to pursue a career in the same industry. The passion was gone.
However, I had hope that no longer forcing myself to watch the Premier League, or keep up with the news, my desire to tune in would return and I could get back to being a ‘football fan’.
It hasn’t.
I watched Lille lose to Chelsea in the Champions League. But I’ve not seen a league game since before I went to NYC in the middle of September.
I’ve just not been around the TV to tune in. I’m not going to sit in on a Saturday afternoon to try and stream the 16:30 KO. That’s just not me anymore.
The most English football I’ve watched was when I popped in to see Tom in September and he was watching United.
I don’t have to pay attention any more, so I’ve distanced myself as far away as possible.
What has surprised me though, is how much I haven’t missed it.
I checked in on the Marseille v Lille game on Saturday, seeing what the score was, and it’s still annoying to see them lose. But I’ve not search out the highlights.
Last month I went to four wrestling shows, took Scott Johnston around Manchester, went to watch films with Tom, recorded an Arnold Schwarznegger special of our Dubbel Feature podcast and went to see Avenue Q with Catrin.
In years gone by, and my ex-wife will back this up, my weekends revolved around football. Friday night games, home on a Saturday night to watch the multiplex, up early on a Sunday to watch another from the Saturday. Making her go to 12pm showings at the cinema so I’m back for the 2pm KO and then it was Ligue 1 all the way till 10pm.
It felt alien to not be watching, writing, commenting on what had gone on that weekend.
That was the dedication needed to build a career. You have to know more than anyone else. You have to put the time in.
Now, I’m just a normal guy, working a normal job in an office. I don’t need to know who the up and coming stars are. I don’t need to know Strasbourg’s formation and how they play. So I don’t.
Maybe it will come back. But there’s a chance it won’t. Part of me feels guilty. Like I’m letting go of an old childhood friend. Probably the same feeling when I stopped caring about Celtic back in 2011.
I owe so much to French football, but it doesn’t mean it was going to last forever. I still care about Lille. I love the city and the people, but I know they will still always be there.
If I am at home and the game is on TV, I’ll watch it. I’ll still always care about how they get on. It just won’t dominate my life.
https://twitter.com/Gibney_A/status/1191002416042446849?s=20
I have new commitments, and being just an NFL fan — with a side column on Paddy Power — feels like when I first got involved with Ligue 1. It’s fun, it’s new, I’m learning and I’m loving it.
I don’t need to know it all, but with the type of personality I have, I will continue to digest and learn.
It’s the same with wrestling. I love it, it’s such a fun escape, and it’s brought me friends and a sense of belonging in Manchester, something which I struggled to find since arriving in 2014.
Football did that when Twitter was a very different beast. At my wedding, the Bride and three of my four best man I met on Twitter and those relationships started, pretty much because of football.
Right now, where I am in my life, football and I are on a break. Maybe, like Ross and Rachel, one day we’ll sort it out, but I’m not ready to make the first move.
I’m sorry if you follow me on Twitter for anything football related. Please feel free to mute/unfollow me.
All you are going to get now are random wrestling shows, stupid comments, NFL takes, food, cat pictures and maybe the odd Victor Osimhen goal clip.
If that’s enough to keep you on board, I thank you for your continued service.
